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Q: I have a 3 years old daughter who has just discover that by firming her leg muscles and pressing her gentile against a table or a sofa, she can feel good. She thinks this is a form of play and she calls it : “pretending to pee” . Although I know this is not sexual at all at her age, I really feel bad and don’t know how to react to the behavior. Is this normal behavior? Can this behavior harmful?

A: Masturbating is the most common and normal behavior of all ages during the history. Babies as young as 7 months can start masturbating. Usually the pick of the behavior is between 3 to 5 years of age. It then declines in frequency until puberty. The behavior itself can not harm your child at all. The problem is when the child does it in public. Young children usually do not know the difference between public or privet. So this is something that should be tough to them. You can tell your daughter that : ” You know we shouldn’t nose picking while around others or it is not acceptable to go in front of others without close or underwear, this is the same you shouldn’t do this in daycare or when around other people. Because they know and they say to themselves that this child hasn’t learned that he/she shouldn’t do this in front of others” If the child still does it in public, you should treat it as you would to any other behavior that is not acceptable in public places.  The next thing to do is to keep your daughter as busy as possible and manage activities for her that reduce the free time for her to remember of this behavior. There is a short but very practical handout for parents to read in this website as well. You can find it in under the parenting skills.